Menopause and Foster Care

Over 33 million women in the UK will experience menopause, which is the end of a woman’s reproductive years and, typically, monthly menstruation. In most women, menopause occurs between the ages of 45 and 55. Technically speaking, menopause is just one day, exactly 12 months after the last menstrual bleed. Menopause is the loss of ovarian follicular function and a decline in circulating blood oestrogen levels. Menopause can be gradual, with the most common symptoms occurring during perimenopause, a phase which can last even 10 years and happens generally between the ages of 35 and 45. Perimenopause is when women tend to experience the most challenging symptoms, which can affect physical, emotional, mental, and social health, as well as work.

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At Fosterli, we want to shine a light on topics that affect foster carers. Given that the average age of foster carers in the UK is 55, and around 80% are female, many foster carers may be experiencing menopause and its associated impacts. Symptoms of perimenopause can include:

• Physical Symptoms: hot flashes, night sweats, fatigue, urinary problems, and joint pain.
• Emotional and hormonal fluctuations: mood shifts, increased levels of frustration and anger, low mood and anxiety. Some women can experience an onset of suicidal thoughts.
• Increased sleep disturbances, including difficulties falling asleep and difficulties staying asleep.
• Cognitive changes: memory lapses or difficulty concentrating and retaining information.

No two women experience symptoms the same way, and there is currently no foolproof way to predict or eradicate them, although medical treatments and nutritional and lifestyle changes can help manage them. Because of this, we must not assume what a person’s experience of menopause may be within the fostering community or wider society. We must also challenge the notion that women experiencing symptoms impacting their ability to take part in everyday life should be accepted as normal. We need to be informed about menopause, ask the right questions, and ensure suitable support is provided.

Looking at the non-exhaustive list of symptoms, it is easy to see how these could impact a foster carer looking after vulnerable children who have experienced trauma and require high levels of emotional attunement, nurturing, and constant hands-on care. The assessment process and being an approved foster carer, albeit highly rewarding, can often be intense and tiring. Carers are expected to attend and host meetings, sometimes court hearings, and training while completing the day-to-day tasks involved in caring for children. Physical or emotional symptoms, such as mood shifts or memory lapses, add stress to these tasks and may leave some foster carers unable to stay on top of their responsibilities or cope with them. Experiencing Menopause may also mean that foster carers react in ways they normally wouldn't, become easily tired, lack the energy for as much hands-on time with the children, appear unorganised, or miss appointments they previously never missed. It could even mean that they feel unable to continue being a foster carer unless they receive appropriate support.

At Fosterli, we want to champion foster carers to keep doing the amazing work they do, and for that, they need support and to be heard and understood. It is crucial that these symptoms are not ignored or weaponised, but that curious conversations happen to better understand what they are experiencing and how to support them.

If a foster carer finds themselves experiencing difficult symptoms that impact their typical fostering tasks, it is vital that they feel able to turn to their personal network, social worker, local authority, or fostering agency for informed guidance, support, and understanding. Key areas for change within the sector should include: supervising social workers feeling able to broach conversations about menopause; clarity that if a carer shares they are struggling with symptoms, it will not be used against them; and social care and fostering workers being trained to understand and support carers going through menopause. Fostering medical advisors should be well equipped to understand and recognise the impact of menopause to ensure the agency supports them appropriately.

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It is also vital that carers can access support and are encouraged to do so. This can include promoting self-care and education about menopause, making medical support readily available, building on their support networks to offer emotional and practical help, and providing short breaks from fostering when needed. Most importantly, these conversations and support pathways need to be informed by those who have experienced menopause to ensure they are relevant and accessible.

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Menopause is not just a ‘woman’s issue’. Just as we recognise and understand puberty as a natural stage of life, menopause deserves the same openness, awareness and support. Across the fostering sector, we have an opportunity to normalise conversations, improve understanding and ensure foster carers feel informed, valued and supported throughout this stage of life.

You can learn more about the menopause and read about women’s real life experiences here https://menopausesupport.co.uk